You guys DO NOT UNDERSTAND how happy I was to find this black turtleneck. I mean "collector of black turtlenecks" has been a part of my social media profiles for what, 5 years now? Let us pretend for one moment that social media profiles are truly significant, and that this, THIS IS WHO I AM. This is it. This is my essence. This is my legacy. This is my own personal Shangri-La in clothing form. This is the pot of gold at the end of my rainbow. This is the one thing that I would wear every single day for the rest of my life, forever and ever, amen.
Am I taking this black turtleneck too seriously?
More like, am I taking it seriously enough?