it's a good thing he's cute

Thursday, July 22

So I'm gonna be straight here, cause we're all grown-ups and we can handle it right?
I'm on my period.
{ok. the worst is over.}
I'm bloated. My hormones are wild and crazy and I'm not on the top of my game tonight. Probably safe to say I'm a little cranky too. And all I want in the whole wide world is for husband to scoop me up off me feet, carry me to bed, say absolutely nothing to me for 30 whole minutes and rub my lower back before it bursts into flames, because now, having put aside the fact that he's a man, he completely understands what a travesty it is to be bleeding from your unmentionables for 5 straight days and will do anything to wait on my every whim and want until everything turns back into unicorns and rainbows.
{unicorns and rainbows = married life when wife is happy}

Ahhh. But alas.
It did not happen like this.

Like, at all.

His 3 strikes as follows:
1. I got the grab. {Normally, this unconcious behavior doesn't bother me. But sometimes my middle parts need some loving too. Esp when they're sick.}
2. While massaging my own aching back and maybe whining just a little, he leaned back sprawled on the bed and said, "ya know ... I'm feeling a little bloated myself."
3. Then while he was asking me what I wanted to do for the evening, he stopped mid-sentence to say, "Hey there ... you're breaking out a bit aren'tcha?"

As you can see, I've taught him nothing.

Lucky for him, my 5 days ain't up yet.
So we get to try again tomorrow.



Johanna said...

Hands down

Best post i've ever read

I laughed so hard I almost peed a little

Emily's Going Nuts said...

Oh my goodness... I'm dying! This is the story of my life! Men...

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