Isla turns one, and these aren't tears, no really I'm fine

Wednesday, August 26

One year ago, right this minute, I was soaking up the delicious newborn smells of Isla Loie. I was in a cocoon of endorphins and newborn toes, honestly trying to ignore any part of the world outside our suite that did not involve feeding and cuddling my baby and having, you know what? REALLY decent food brought to me every three hours. Those days were perfect and she was perfect.
Tonight, I took that same girl, now ten times chunkier and spunkier, upstairs to bed. We settled onto the sheets, threw the covers back, and cozied up to each other. Isla was exhausted from stair climbing and birthday caking and all manner of exploring/grabbing fistfuls of her brother's hair/eating his cars, but as we sidled up next to each other in the dark, she looked up at me with a giant grin, searching my face for permission to dive into our nightly before-bed routine. Absorbing my smile, she scrunched her face up into a squinty-eyed pout, and held it, posing like a boss, until she couldn't possibly hold it anymore and her breath pushed out of her, bursting into a giggle. She pulled her face back up again, this time pushing her lower lip up over her top lip and tipped her head back, holding it in stoic silence until her breath pushed out of her and she was a pile of giggles again, curled up in the crook of my arm. I mirrored her game, blowing my cheeks up and holding my breath, as we packed on a few more minutes of one-year-old humor. I then pulled out my secret weapon. The ol' ear-rub-slash-leg-rub-after-the-stealthy-flip-onto-the-belly trick. Combined with a near silent rendition of You Are My Sunshine, and she was out faster than she's ever been, maybe this entire year. And that was it. There she was, my silently slumbering one-year-old, sprawled out on the bed, looking entirely too big and entirely too small all at the same time. I watched her for a minute and celebrated to myself. I did it. I made it a year. I really made it through another newborn year and I did it with two. And just look at her. She's beautiful. She's mine and she's ours, and the three of us are so lucky to have her.

So happy first birthday to you my sunshine girl. I love you so much it hurts. You're the Isla of my dreams.

the dry farm in idaho

Tuesday, August 25

Can you believe this view? CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE IT? Behind the lens that took this photograph, was me, trying desperately to be a sponge. To memorize that view and melt it into my brain. To soak in the warm summer air, allergies and all, and just be. My aunt and uncle have built an oasis, referred to as, the dry farm, in the hills above the snake river valley. That dry farm has been a part of many fond childhood summer memories, but I hadn't been back in years, until the beginning of this month when our family plans miraculously converged, and we were able to spend an entire week in Idaho's green country together.

Please excuse me while I cry through these photos and google time machines.

Sun worshiping, being super cool, etc ...

This is Isla's thing right now. She cheeses so hard you can barely see her eyes, and then she turns to everyone in the room individually so that each person can partake of her cheese. At this moment it was Everett's turn.

And finally, here we have evidence that I will cave to peer pressure. Tyson was beside himself that I picked up a gun when he wasn't around to witness.

You guys, take me back.

life is beautiful with you

Monday, August 24


I'm experiencing a little nostalgia this evening as I flip through our archives of family pictures, one folder after another, one year after the next, seeing us, and our life and our love and what its progression looks like in photo form. Everett sat on my lap tonight and for the first time, we went through his birth pictures together. He asked me a number of questions, wondering why I had been crying, and why I was in the bathtub, and why his "bili cord" was so colorful, and why he came out looking so "juicy" (haha!). As we came across a picture of the three of us together right after he was born, Everett said, "Daddy loves you mama, and baby Everett!" It was soul-crushingly sweet and rewarding x 1000, watching him be able to observe on our faces just exactly what it meant to welcome him into our lives that day.
This he knows! His Dad loves his mom, and his dad loves him. And this, being the roundabout way of telling you and thanking you for how good you are at loving us. I could not have hoped for a better partner in this life, and on this, your thirtieth year, I am so glad you're mine. I mean, I liked you in your twenties and all, but the thirties are just so much sexier.

Happy Birthday you.

isla loie takes a three hour nap

Monday, July 27


Let it be known that on this day, in the heart of July, exactly one month before her first birthday, Isla Lo and her mother took a three hour nap. We don't know how or why, but it is our hunch that in her benevolent goodness and rolls, Isla has realized that we, as her parents, have almost made it through another year one, and will probably need a nap here and there before things really get going on the toddler front. Either that, or it's her best attempt at bribing us for a bigA chocolate cake at her party. 

Which we'll probably oblige.

the L.A. flower market

Monday, July 13

My sister and I took a girl's trip to L.A. with a couple of friends last month. All in all, we were four women, and four babies, two rental cars and one condo. Which is just about as insane as it sounds.

It started off well.  Isla and I were on our way to the airport when I got notification that our flight had been cancelled. So the lady baby and I spent the rest of the morning and afternoon waiting in line, so that we could get bumped to a different flight, which ended up taking off late that evening. As delightful as that sounds, it actually wasn't terrible; spending all that time at the airport when everyone around you is rightfully like, OMGGGG, and you're like, guys, guys. You don't understand. I could have a three-year-old with me right now.

That is the blessing of having two I guess. When you go back to having just one, it's kind of like winning the brain lottery. SO MUCH ROOM FOR MY OWN THOUGHTS, I MIGHT AS WELL BE MEDITATING; SOMEBODY GIVE ME A MATH PROBLEM.

It was so awesome to spend the week with just Isla. It reminded me of the old days when it was just me and Everett, taking on the world; getting to experience my baby one on one. I didn't even know I had missed it until I got to L.A.! Of course, she'll never remember it, but spending that time with just my sunshine girl was so connective and needed. I love love loved it.

The time we had there felt packed to the gills, but we did manage to steal an afternoon in the L.A. flower district. So please enjoy the following 4000 pictures of peonies. Had to be done.
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